This morning as I was taking Jadon to school, we witnessed an accident. A guy in a minivan pulled out of a parking lot right in front of oncoming traffic and was struck by another lady. She ended up in the turn lane, and he ended up sideways across both of our lanes. He pulled forward & turned around, presumably (I thought) to get out of the way. It took a minute to register that he was not stopping! As he took off down the highway, I and another driver sped after him in an attempt to get his license number or let the police know where he was. I got stopped at a light, but thankfully the other driver was able to keep up with him and lead the police to his location. It is amazing to me that he was able to continue to drive with pieces flying off of his van all the way up the highway. Or that his conscience would allow him to even try. It was his fault, and I'm guessing he didn't have insurance, but fleeing the scene certainly didn't earn him any brownie points with the law, or the other woman involved.
It got me to thinking (Big surprise, I know) about the lack of responsibility in the world today. Nobody wants to admit they are wrong. About anything. We don't want to acknowledge that there are things inside of us that cause us to act or react in ways that are not God honoring or respectful to others. If we can blame our parents, employers, employees, brothers and sisters, teachers, coaches, co-workers, friends, pastors, or our history, the things that have happened to or around us, then we think we are free and clear. But we aren't, because we know that when it comes right down to it, we have made bad choices. We have been unloving. We have lied, cheated, lashed out in anger, been unforgiving, and held onto bitterness with every ounce of strength we have, using it to justify our negative behavior. We are speeding down the highway with a trail of wrecks behind us, leaving debris from our hearts and others' along the way, thinking we can outrun the truth and the consequences.
I'm not saying that we have to live with guilt and shame over our actions. Not at all! But that guilt and shame will keep us in bondage whether we ever admit it to anyone else or not. We know the truth, and that sin will eat us alive as long as we hold onto it. The only way we can truly live free in the forgiveness that Christ offers is to acknowledge where we have failed. We need to call sin sin. We need to take responsibility, repent and ask forgiveness, whether the other person or people involved ever do the same or not. Our freedom depends on us doing the right thing. When we do that, we are finally free of the guilt and shame that keeps us in bondage.
Psalm 51 is a beautiful picture of this truth in the life of David. It says,
1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you are proved right when you speak
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts;
you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.
7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will turn back to you.
14 Save me from bloodguilt, O God,
the God who saves me,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
15 O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.
18 In your good pleasure make Zion prosper;
build up the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then there will be righteous sacrifices,
whole burnt offerings to delight you;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.
David had to first acknowledge that he was sinful. He knew that the Lord desired truth in his inmost being, the places that nobody else could see. He recognized that the consequences for sin were a crushed spirit, a body with nothing to offer. He knew that it was only through a right relationship with God that He could be clean. And he knew that God was the only one who could make him clean. The best part is, after he finally repented, rejected his sin and turned to God, he was filled with joy and gladness, could worship in truth, and was able to teach others God's ways-not because he had never messed up, but because he HAD. And he had come out on the other side of sin restored before the God who loved him always.
What's holding you back? Why are you running? Stop. Turn around. There will you find the open arms of Jesus waiting to pick up all of your broken pieces and bring you to the Father, whole and holy.
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